How To Influence Others by Ben Fronczek

http://granvillenychurchofchrist.org/?p=416

How To Influence Others

Cornelius Acts 10   (part 3)

Starting in Matthew 5:13 Jesus said, “You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.  You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden.  Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” (13-16)

Being a good manager of what God has given you is called “stewardship.” A lot of people think of money when we say stewardship – but stewardship is more than that. One of the primary things that we have the responsibility to manage for God is the power or influence that He has given us over others.

Everyone has influence. Jesus said,  “You are the salt of the earth.”

What is your influence like? We influence others in ways that we may not even think about.

A mother took her young son shopping. After a day in the stores, a clerk handed the little boy a lollipop. “What do you say?” the mother said to the boy, to which he replied, “Just put it on my credit card!”

Like it or not, that mom had influenced that little boy thought process by her actions through the day.

Another mom was taking her little boy to school, since the dad had to go to work early. You see he normally took his son to school before work. The little boy kept looking around on the way to school. Halfway there, the little boy said, “Mom, where are the idiots?”
She asked, “Honey, what do you mean?”
“Well,” said the little boy, “usually Dad and I see at least three or four idiots on the way to school.”

Whether it’s your kids, or your co-workers, your family or your friends, YOU can influence how they think and even what they may do. The question is, what direction is your influence leading people.

Over the past couple of week we’ve been looking at a man named Cornelius in Acts chapter 10. He was the Roman soldier, a centurion, the leader of men that apparently turned his back on the pagan worship of his people and became a devoted believer of our Lord and God.

He was a man who was changed by his belief in, and love for God. And as we will see today, that belief  manifested itself  in a positive way and had an effect on others.

Research experts tell us we communicate only 7% with our words. We communicate 35% with our tone of voice and then 58% with our actions.

Cornelius acted on what He knew to be true, on what he believed about God. And up to this point, Cornelius had only been given limited information about God. He wasn’t a Christian yet, but He was faithful with what God had revealed to him and acted appropriately and in a way that not only pleased God, but also impressed other, including the Jews that knew him. Normally they hated the Romans but we read that they respected this man, and had nothing but good to say about him.

I believe he realized that being religious was not about just going church or existing in some kind of meditative trance 24/7.

A natural byproduct of being devoted to the Lord entailed becoming like, or having an effect like salt and light has in this world by practicing what we believe, and living it out.

James wrote this about religion.  In James 1:27 it says,  “Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.”

That is what Cornelius was doing. He was letting his light shine when he gave to the poor and widows and orphans that were in need. Those gifts seasoned like tasty salt, and they came up as a memorial offering before God.

What James was saying was that, ‘true worship is practiced day in and day by loving and helping others, because we belong to Him.’  In 1 John 4:20, he wrote, “ If anyone says, “I love God,” yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen.””

What I also see here in this text is a man who is not only devoted to God, we also get a glimpse of his spiritual influence and leadership;  His ability to influence people in the right direction.  Maybe Peter thought that when he got to Cornelius he was going to have a one on one study, but as we read you’ll see that that was not the case  In Acts 10:24-27 it says,  “The following day he arrived in Caesarea. Cornelius was expecting them and had called together his relatives and close friends. As Peter entered the house, Cornelius met him and fell at his feet in reverence. But Peter made him get up. “Stand up,” he said, “I am only a man myself.”  While talking with him, Peter went inside and found a large gathering of people.

Cornelius had a crowd at his house. They were friends and family that had enough respect for him that came when he asked. He knew that what Peter would have to say was important and he wanted others to hear these spiritual truths as well. And those people responded to him.

Besides being a leader of military men, I also believe that Cornelius was a spiritual leader as well. And I believe that this is something we need more of today.  Spiritual leaders are men and women who take it upon themselves to be salt and light and become spiritual guides to others.

In the time remaining I would like to share a few principles that I believe will help you become a good influence and a better spiritual leader:

1. First of all, as I read in the Bible, about great spiritual leaders that had the best influence, I find that they themselves were very dedicated to God. Look at men like Abraham, Moses, David, Daniel, and even Jesus Himself, first and foremost, God was the center of their life. Even the Apostle Paul; they were all willing to live and die for our Lord. They were TOTALLY dedicated to their Lord!

2. I think you need to realize the power that you have and make a conscious decision that you are going to do your best to serve Him and lead others in the right direction and become that, “salt and light..”  I think it’s foolish if you don’t believe you have power and influence over others. Like it or not, you do. You are going influence people one way or the other. If you want to influence others in a positive way, I think you’ve really got to make a decision to do so. We need to realize that everything we say and do around others will leave an impression on them, and in turn will influence them whether you realize it or not, and if you want to or not..

3. The third thing I believe we need to do if we hope to be a good influence and lead people in the right direction is we need to ask for God’s help. One thing I really admire about Solomon is when he first became king after his father David, God was willing to grant him a request. And instead of asking for wealth and longevity, we read that he asked God to guide him and give him wisdom to lead his people. I can’t help but believe that he learned that he needed God’s help and guidance from his dad, David who leaned upon the Lord as well.

If you have any hope of being a good spiritual leader and guiding people in the right direction, we not only need to be fully committed to our Lord and make a conscious decision to be a positive influence, we also need to realize that we are not good enough, strong enough or wise enough to do it on our own. We need our Lord’s help.

4^th. Another thing you may need to consider if you want to become a good Spiritual leaders and influence certain people in a positive way is the fact that you need to Get close to those you want to influence. Salt doesn’t work unless it comes in contact with the food. It doesn’t do any good sitting on your table in your salt shaker. It’s got to get out of the saltshaker and onto the food to make it taste better. In the same way, it’s difficult to influence people from a distance or without personal contact. The more quality time you spend with them, whether they are your kids, neighbors or co-workers the more  influence you going to have on them..

#5.  We also need to be consistent and steadfast when it comes to our personal beliefs and how we live them out. Jesus said,  that ‘if the salt loses its saltiness or flavor, what good is it? It is good for nothing but to be thrown out and trampled on by men.’

Who is going to listen to a hypocrite?    Part-time or luke-warm Christians not only start to loose their  ability to influence others in a positive way, luke-warm Christians can end up BEING the ones who are influenced by everyone else. It’s like salt that is losing it’s flavor – it’s not worth anything. Jesus said, “You might as well throw it out.”

#6. And last but by no means least one of the most powerful things we can do to influence people in a positive way is to love them. Agape love always seeks the other person’s highest good, whether it be a hug or a rebuke.  Without love your action may just come across as empty or hollow.

Do you remember what Paul said in 1 Corinthians 13; “If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.”

Conclusion:  Jesus didn’t ask, “Do you want to become salt and light in this world?” He said, “You are the salt of the earth, and light.”  You have a power and influence over those you come in close contact with… like it or not.   So if you want to influence your family, friends, co-workers, children in a positive way, you’ve got to start by being the right kind of person yourself.  Seek God’s help. I believe Cornelius had a house full of people because he knew how to influence people the right way.  May we learn to use the influence we have in a way that helps others and glorifies our Lord.