From Mark Copeland... Wisdom Regarding Alcohol (Proverbs)

                         "THE BOOK OF PROVERBS"

                        Wisdom Regarding Alcohol

INTRODUCTION

1. A serious problem today involves the consumption of alcohol...
   a. More than thirty percent of Americans at some time in their lives
      has had an alcohol use disorder - Bridget Gant, National Institute
      On Alcohol Abuse And Alcoholism
   b. Nearly 100,000 people die every year of alcohol-related causes
      - Dr. James C. Garbutt, medical director of the Alcohol and
      Substance Abuse Program (UNC at Chapel Hill)
   c. Alcohol is more dangerous than some illegal drugs like marijuana
      or Ecstasy and should be classified as such in legal systems
      - Professor David Nutt, Bristol University
   d. Alcohol is blamed for more than half of all visits to hospital
      emergency rooms - ibid.

2. The Book of Proverbs warns against the dangers of alcohol...
   a. Whether in the form of wine or strong drink
   b. With the potential of leading one astray - Pr 20:1

[What further wisdom can be gleaned from Proverbs concerning alcohol?
Let's see...]

I. ALCOHOL IN THE BOOK OF PROVERBS

   A. ALCOHOL CAN LEAD TO POVERTY...
      1. A warning against those who love wine - Pr 21:17
      2. A warning against spending time with winebibbers and drunkards
         - Pr 23:20-21
      -- Alcohol has been the downfall of many businessmen

   B. ALCOHOL CAN DESTROY LIVES...
      1. It can lead to woe and sorrow, contentions and complaints,
         wounds without cause and redness of eyes - Pr 23:29-30
      2. It is seductive, and can destroy one just like the seductress
         - Pr 23:31-32; 5:3-5; 6:24-26
      3. It can alter your senses, leading you to say things you'll
         later regret (e.g., "office parties") - Pr 23:33
      4. It gives a false sense of security, exposing you to great
         danger (e.g., "driving drunk") - Pr 23:34-35
      -- Alcohol has destroyed many lives, both those who drink and
         innocent ones who cross their paths

   C. ALCOHOL IMPAIRS JUDGMENT...
      1. Which is why kings and princes were to abstain - Pr 31:4-5
      2. It is better reserved for the dying and devastated - Pr 31:6-7
      -- Alcohol is not for those who would be wise

[Indeed, "Wine is a mocker, Strong drink is a brawler, And whoever is
led astray by it is not wise." (Pr 20:1).  Because of such warnings,
and with the serious problems with alcohol in our society, let's review
what is said about...]

II. ALCOHOL IN THE LIVES OF CHRISTIANS

   A. WHAT IS CONDEMNED...
      1. Drunkenness
         a. A work of darkness, not an element of the armor of light
            - Ro 13:11-14
         b. Conduct that not repented of will keep one out of the
            kingdom of God - 1Co 6:9-10; Ga 5:19-21
         c. Conduct suitable for church discipline - 1Co 5:11-13
      2. Social drinking
         a. We are to dedicate ourselves to doing the will of God, not
            the lusts of men - 1Pe 4:1-2
         b. Thus we are to abstain from drunkenness, revelries, drinking
            parties - 1Pe 4:3
         c. Though we should expect others to think ill of us for
            abstaining - 1Pe 4:4
      -- The popular and common use of alcohol has no place in the life
         of the Christian

   B. WHAT IS COMMANDED...
      1. Concern for the weaknesses of others - Ro 14:14-18
         a. Are we willing to destroy the one for whom Christ died?
         b. Are we more interested in righteousness, peace, and joy in
            the Holy Spirit?
      2. Willingness to forego wine if a stumbling block to others - Ro 14:19-21
         a. Do we know someone who struggles with alcohol abuse and
            addiction?
         b. Do we love them more than any presumed right we may have to
            drink?
      3. Evidently Timothy had chosen  to forego wine for such reasons
         - cf. 1Ti 5:23
         a. Paul prescribed that Timothy drink wine for medicinal
            purposes
         b. Wine was often used to purify water, yet for some reason
            Timothy had abstained
      -- The Christian must prayerfully consider the role of influence
         regarding alcohol

CONCLUSION

1. What is wisdom regarding the consumption of alcohol...?
   a. In view of the warnings found in Proverbs?
      1) It can lead to poverty
      2) It can destroy lives
      3) It impairs judgment
   b. In view of the teachings found in the New Testament?
      1) Prohibitions concerning drunkenness
      2) Concerns regarding influence on weaker brethren

2. What is wisdom in light of the problems of alcohol abuse in our
   society today...?
   a. Shall we flirt with the seducing effects of alcohol?
      1) Alcohol can be tempting and easily ensnare the unsuspecting
      2) If one in three have succumbed, might not we?
   b. Shall we be insensitive to the weaknesses that many have regarding
      alcohol?
      1) Alcohol is the number one drug problem we face today
      2) If one in three have problems with it, dare we become stumbling
         blocks to them?

It shouldn't take the wisdom of Solomon to see that Christians should
take the dangers of alcohol seriously and be proactive in helping
themselves and others to remain free from its clutches...!

Executable Outlines, Copyright © Mark A. Copeland, 2011

From Mark Copeland... Wisdom Regarding Speech (Proverbs)

                         "THE BOOK OF PROVERBS"

                        Wisdom Regarding Speech

INTRODUCTION

1. Christians are to give careful heed to their speech...
   a. Avoiding corrupt words, speaking that which edifies - Ep 4:29
   b. Abstaining from filthy talk, giving thanks instead - Ep 5:4

2. The book of Proverbs has much to say about speech...
   a. The power of speech
   b. Both to tear down and to build up - Pr 11:9,11

[What wisdom can be gleaned from Proverbs concerning our speech or
language?  First, there is the...]

I. DESTRUCTIVE USE OF SPEECH

   A. LYING...
      1. Which is an abomination to God - Pr 12:22; 6:17-19
         a. Lying lips, a lying tongue
         b. Bearing false witness
      2. Often fostered by hatred - Pr 10:18; 26:24-28
         a. In efforts to hide hatred
         b. Trying to disguise one's true feelings
      3. Which will prove to be short-lived - Pr 12:19; 20:17; 21:6
         a. Just for a moment
         b. Sweet at first, but only a fleeting fantasy
      -- Lying will eventually destroy the liar, and often the one lied
         about

   B. FLATTERY...
      1. Not sincere compliments, but deceitful praise to win another's
         favor and to manipulate
      2. Also a source of ruin - Pr 26:28; 29:5
         a. Often crushing others
         b. By entrapping those who are flattered
      3. Often used effectively by the adulteress - Pr 6:24; 7:21
         a. A truly evil woman
         b. Who uses enticing speech to seduce
      -- Like lying, flattery can destroy both the user and subject of
         it

   C. GOSSIP...
      1. Also known as the tale-bearer, slanderer, whisperer - Pr 11:13
         a. Who reveals secrets
         b. Unlike a faithful person
      2. Betrays and destroys friendships - Pr 17:9
         a. By repeating a matter
         b. When one who truly loves will remain silent
      3. Creates strife - Pr 16:27-28; 26:20-22
         a. Revealing the perverse character of the gossip
         b. Whose words are like wood to a fire
      4. Destroys character and integrity - Pr 11:9; 25:9-10
         a. The work of a true hypocrite
         b. Whose own reputation will eventually be ruined
      -- Whether true or not is incidental; gossip destroys both the
         user and the subject

   D. CURSING...
      1. Especially one's parents - Pr 20:20; cf. Exo 21:17; Lev 20:9
         a. Such a person's lamp would soon be put out in deep darkness
         b. Under the Law of Moses, it was a capital offense
      2. But also another's associate - Pr 30:10
         a. Even maligning a lowly servant can be disastrous
         b. The master (or servant) may turn on you
      -- Speaking evil of others harms one's self as much as those
         spoken against

[As James tells us in his epistle, there is great danger in misuse of
the tongue (Jm 3:2-12).  But there can also be much good done through
proper speech (Pr 15:4)...]

II. CONSTRUCTIVE USE OF SPEECH

   A. GOOD WORDS...
      1. Words of the righteous - Pr 10:11,20-21
         a. A well of life
         b. As choice silver
         c. That feeds many
      2. Pleasant words - Pr 16:24
         a. Like a honeycomb
         b. Sweetness to the soul, health to the bones
      3. Comforting words - Pr 12:25
         a. Addressed to the anxious and depressed
         b. Making their hearts glad
      -- Such speech reveals the good heart of the speaker

   B. TIMELY WORDS...
      1. Well-timed words - Pr 15:23; 25:11
         a. Spoken in due season, how joyful and good it is!
         b. Like apples of gold in settings of silver
      2. Well-thought words - Pr 15:28
         a. Studied carefully by a righteous person
         b. On how best to answer
      -- Such speech reveals the wisdom of the speaker

   C. CONTROLLED WORDS...
      1. That benefits the one who speaks - Pr 13:2-3; 15:1-2; 21:23
         a. Preserving the life of the one who guards his mouth
         b. Defusing potentially violate situations
         c. Keeping one's soul from trouble
      2. That reveals true knowledge and understanding - Pr 10:19; 17:
         27-28
         a. By sparing words, with a calm spirit
         b. Which even a fool can benefit from
      -- Such speech will enhance the reputation of the speaker

CONCLUSION

1. From Proverbs we learn the value of being careful of our speech...
   a. Avoiding much harm to ourselves and to others
   b. Doing much good to ourselves and to others

2. Which may help us appreciate why Paul was so concerned that
   Christians...
   a. Let their speech always be with grace - Col 4:6
   b. Let no unwholesome word come out of their mouths, only good words
      - Ep 4:29

Do we truly appreciate the importance and wisdom of the right kind of
speech...?

Executable Outlines, Copyright © Mark A. Copeland, 2011

From Mark Copeland... Wisdom Regarding Work (Proverbs)

                         "THE BOOK OF PROVERBS"

                         Wisdom Regarding Work

INTRODUCTION

1. The responsibilities of being a Christian are many, one of which is
   providing a proper example...
   a. We are to be the light of the world and the salt of the earth - Mt 5:13-16
   b. This requires outstanding and honorable conduct on our part - 1 Pe 2:12
   c. This is especially true as we go about the business of making a
      living - cf. 2Th 3:11-12

2. But how can we be sure that we behave properly toward outsiders in
   our business affairs...?
   a. We've seen that Proverbs has much wisdom to offer in regards to
      friends and family
   b. It also has much to say regarding every day work and business!

[As one who was employed in secular work before devoting my full
energies to preaching the gospel, I found Proverbs to be especially
helpful in this area.  For example, from Proverbs I learned...]

I. TO KEEP WORK IN ITS PROPER PLACE

   A. REMEMBER WHAT SHOULD TAKE PRIORITY...
      1. It is a fact of life that we must work to live and provide forf
         our families
         a. If we aren't willing to work, the church is under no
            obligation to help us - 2Th 3:6
         b. If we don't provide for our families, we are worse than
            unbelievers - 1Ti 5:8
      2. But misplaced priorities can be very harmful to our well-being!
         a. Righteousness, not riches, is what is truly profitable - Pro 11:4
         b. One should therefore seek to be righteous, not rich - Pro 11:28
      3. It is better to have a little with righteousness, than to be
         rich and wicked - Pr 16:8

   B. INVOLVE GOD IN OUR BUSINESS AFFAIRS...
      1. For then our efforts are more likely to succeed - Pr 16:3 (cf.
         how the Lord blessed Joseph - Gen 39:2-5)
      2. We are more likely to be able to enjoy what we receive - Pro 10:22; cf. Ec 5:18-6:2

   C. REMEMBER THAT BUSINESS HAS A MAJOR SHORTCOMING...
      1. We never know what might happen tomorrow - Pr 27:1; cf. Jm 4:
         13-16
      2. Wealth is a fleeting commodity not worth killing yourself in
         order to obtain - Pr 23:4-5

[Many people come to learn these truths only after a lifetime, when they
realize they wasted their years on things not truly important, but the
value of Proverbs is that even the young can know them early and apply
them to their lives!  From Proverbs I also learned...]

II. TO BE SUCCESSFUL LABORER

   A. WHAT "NOT" TO DO...
      1. Be lazy, for it will greatly irritate your boss! - Pr 10:26
      2. Be slothful in your work, for it will ruin your company as
         quick as a competing company (and how long will your job last
         if your company can't compete?) - cf. Pr 18:9

   B. WHAT ONE "SHOULD" DO...
      1. Develop skill in your work (it will not go unnoticed) - Pro 22:29
      2. Be diligent in your work to ensure your promotion - Pr 12:24
      3. Impress people with the quality of your work, not the quantity
         of your words - Pr 14:23

[In today's competitive job market, among the best "skills" one can have
are such things as "diligence" and "honesty".  The wisdom from Proverbs
can help one become a valuable commodity!  Proverbs also provide wisdom
on how...]

III. TO BE A SUCCESSFUL MANAGER

   A. BE A WISE MANAGER...
      1. Be diligent in your planning, and not too hasty in getting
         things done - Pr 21:5
      2. Nurture and utilize counsel from others - Pr 15:22
      3. Stay on top of your job! - cf. Pr 27:23-27

   B. BE A GOOD LEADER...
      1. Don't be oppressive - Pr 28:16
      2. Be concerned for the rights of your employees - Pr 29:7
      3. Provide good treatment, and you will gain loyalty and love
         - Pr 29:21
      4. Help the employee see how his work benefits himself as well as
         the company, so he will be diligent in his efforts - Pr 16:26

CONCLUSION

1. My experience as both a laborer and a manager gave me opportunity to
   test the wisdom found in Proverbs...

2. I found that if one...
   a. Keeps the need to work in proper perspective
   b. Applies the principles found in Proverbs and other Scriptures

3. That in His providence God...
   a. Not only provides you with the necessities of life
   b. But more often than not a good degree of material abundance!

The important thing to keep in mind is that throughout our business
dealings, we must always heed the words of Jesus:

   "Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness!" (Mt 6:33)

Executable Outlines, Copyright © Mark A. Copeland, 2011

From Mark Copeland... Wisdom Regarding Family (Proverbs)

                         "THE BOOK OF PROVERBS"

                        Wisdom Regarding Family

INTRODUCTION

1. As we continue our study of the Proverbs, we should keep in mind two
   things:
   a. Life is short
   b. Our eternal existence is greatly influenced by how we live during
      this short life

2. It is imperative, then, that we not waste our time through rash and
   foolish decisions...
   a. Which not only jeopardize our eternal destiny
   b. But can also make this life miserable

3. The value of wisdom is especially seen in family relationships...
   a. "He who troubles his own house will inherit the wind..." - Pro
      11:29
   b. Life is too short and families grow too fast for us to raise a
      family through "trial and error"

4. We must seek advice in this all-important task...
   a. But where shall we go?
   b. To so-called "experts" who authoritatively give advice, but then
      all too often change their views later on after the damage has
      been done?  (e.g., Dr. Spock and his earlier views on child-
      raising)

[Fortunately, in His grace God has preserved in His all-sufficient book
the wisdom needed to provide for and raise a family.  Much of this
wisdom in found in The Book Of Proverbs!  To illustrate, let's first
consider some wisdom in...]

I. PROVIDING FOR A FAMILY

   A. WHAT MANY THINK IS MOST IMPORTANT...
      1. Many would say it is the "necessities" of life
         a. Such as food and clothing
         b. And a place of shelter
      2. Most would feel that other things are also necessary...
         a. Such as the "finer things" (luxuries) for the children,
            which parents never had as children
         b. A good "education" for the children, so they too can be
            affluent

   [While there is some merit in these things, inspired wisdom from The
   Book Of Proverbs teaches us not to place emphasis upon such material
   things...]

   B. WHERE THE EMPHASIS SHOULD BE...
      1. Instilling a fear of the Lord - Pr 15:16
         a. More important than riches is providing for your family
            through your own example a deep and abiding respect for the
            Lord
         b. For the fear of the Lord provides:
            a. The beginning of knowledge - Pr 1:7
            b. A means to prolong life - Pr 10:27
            c. The key to avoiding sin - Pr 16:6
            d. The key to true wealth - Pr 22:4
         c. The fear of the Lord, then, is perhaps the most important
            "provision" that one can give to his or her family
      2. Giving them love - Pr 15:17
         a. Providing an environment where love reigns is more important
            than providing material abundance
         b. Troubled children come from homes where "love" is lacking,
            not money!
      3. Providing a peaceful family life - Pr 17:1
         a. Where there is peace and tranquility in a family, material
            affluence matters little
         b. But what value is there in wealth, if we are always fighting
            over the things it provides?
      4. A wise father (or mother) realizes that spiritual provisions
         are more important than material ones
         a. They will see that the family receives what is truly
            important
         b. Even it means cutting back on less important things

   [But when God's wisdom is truly followed, it won't be necessary to go
   without material necessities!  To see why, consider what can be
   done...]

   C. TO ENSURE ADEQUATE MATERIAL PROVISIONS...
      1. Be righteous - Pr 20:7
         a. Today that means putting the kingdom of God first in your
            life - Mt 6:33
         b. Then God will watch out for you and providentially see that
            your needs are adequately
            met!
         c. Children of righteous parents are truly blessed!
         d. But parents who fail to put God first go through life
            without God's providential help, and their children may
            suffer as a result!
      2. Concentrate on acquiring wisdom and knowledge, not wealth - Pro 24:3-4
         a. This would involve a careful study and application of God's
            Word, especially a book like Proverbs
         b. But it also involves living a dedicated life as a disciple
            (learner) of Jesus Christ, in whom are hidden the treasures
            of wisdom and knowledge - cf. Col 2:2-3

[From the Proverbs, then, we learn that the best and wisest thing
parents can do for their family is to provide themselves as obedient
servants of God, and to instill such faith in their children.  If this
is done, God will see that their material needs are met!  But what about
the matter of raising children...?]

II. RAISING CHILDREN

   A. THE PROPER USE OF CORPOREAL PUNISHMENT...
      1. Used properly, it is a demonstration of true love - Pr 13:24
      2. Proper discipline has proper objectives...
         a. To remove foolishness from the child - Pr 22:15
         b. To save the soul of the child - Pr 23:13-14
         c. To impart wisdom and to avoid shame - Pr 29:15
      3. Proper discipline has its rewards - Pr 29:17
         a. Such as "rest" and "delight"
         b. A child who will love you and live in such a way as to bring
            you delight
      4. Of course, there must be the proper application of corporeal
         punishment - Pr 19:18
         a. To be applied before the situation gets of out hand ("while
            there is hope")
         b. To be applied under controlled circumstances ("do not set
            your heart on his destruction")
            1) I.e., do not put it off until you strike in anger
            2) There is a difference between proper "spanking" and
               "child abuse"!
         c. Corporeal punishment should never be a vent for letting off
            steam...
            1) Rather, a controlled use of one method to discourage bad
               behavior
            2) To be accompanied with love! - cf. Ep 6:4 (as implied by
               the word "nurture")

   B. MORE WISDOM FROM A FAMILIAR VERSE - Pr 22:6
      1. As commonly translated:  "train up a child in the way he should
         go"
         a. This allows for the common interpretation in which a child's
            outcome is virtually dependent upon his training, especially
            in spiritual matters
            1) I.e., if the child is brought up right by godly parents,
               the child must turn out all right
            2) So if a child is not a faithful Christian, it must always
               be a failing of the parents
         b. But this view suggests "environmental predestination", or
            "behavioral determinism" (shades of B. F. Skinner, cf. his
            book "Walden II")
      2. Literally, the verse can be translated:  "train up a child
         according to his way"
         a. That is, train up a child according to his or her
            inclinations
         b. For example, don't try to force a child who is mechanically
            inclined to be a doctor or a lawyer
         c. Rather, bring up a child according to his or her aptitude,
            and they will likely continue what they start out in life
            doing (i.e., no "mid-life" crisis or career changes)
         d. Therefore, this verse, like so many in Proverbs, is simply
            giving us practical advice in raising our children (without
            necessarily any spiritual implications)
      3. However, I might add that trying to force a child to go against
         their "aptitude" may encourage a child to rebel in all areas of
         parental influence (including spiritual)

CONCLUSION

1. My purpose has not been to provide an exhaustive treatment of this
   subject covered in Proverbs

2. Rather, to illustrate its value to Christians in all areas of our
   lives...
   a. That it does speak to such matters as providing for a family,
      raising children
   b. So that we will study and meditate on it more often

Since so much of our happiness or lack of it is affected by our family
life, we should want to take advantage of the wisdom offered in this
area by the book of Proverbs...!

Executable Outlines, Copyright © Mark A. Copeland, 2011

From Mark Copeland... Wisdom Regarding Marriage (2) (Proverbs)

                         "THE BOOK OF PROVERBS"

                     Wisdom Regarding Marriage (2)

INTRODUCTION

1. We saw in our previous lesson that Proverbs can be a helpful guide in
   selecting a good spouse

2. In this study, we will consider what it says about being a good
   spouse

3. The importance of this subject should be evident...
   a. Happiness in life is greatly affected by how successful we are in
      marriage
   b. Even our usefulness to the Lord is affected by the relationship
      between husbands and wives
   c. For example, a husband's prayers can be hindered by his treatment
      of his wife - 1Pe 3:7

[Appreciating the importance of a good marriage, let's begin with that
beautiful passage in Proverbs 31 where we read about...]

I. THE VIRTUOUS WIFE

   A. THE IDEAL WIFE...
      1. Trustworthy - Pr 31:11
         a. The husband can safely entrust her with his income
         b. She will not squander what he gives her, but use it in a
            manner that benefits them both
      2. Filled with an enduring love - Pr 31:12
         a. Devoted to doing her husband good all her life
         b. Just as she vowed in the wedding ceremony
      3. Has practical skills - Pr 31:13-15,21-22
         a. Such as sewing
         b. And cooking
      4. Industrious - Pr 31:16,24
         a. Makes investments (buys land and plants a vineyard)
         b. Provides extra income (makes clothing and sells to
            merchants)
      5. Compassionate - Pr 31:20
         a. Helping the poor
         b. Reaching out to the needy
      6. Strong character - Pr 31:25
         a. Character matters, and she has developed a strong one
         b. Just as Peter stressed in 1Pe 3:3-4
      7. Speaks words of wisdom and kindness - Pr 31:26
         a. She is thus concerned about what proceeds from her mouth
         b. Just as Paul stressed in Ep 4:29
      8. Diligently sees to her family's need - Pr 31:27
         a. Makes whatever preparation necessary - cf. Pr 31:15
         b. So that her family does not go in want - cf. Pr 31:21
      9. Fears the Lord - Pr 31:29-30
         a. She understands that this quality is more important and
            praiseworthy than physical beauty
         b. With the fear of the Lord, she has the potential for great
            wisdom - Pr 1:7
      -- Such are the qualities of being a good spouse

   B. WHAT A WIFE DOES NOT WANT TO BE...
      1. Contentious - cf. Pr 21:9,19
      2. Hateful - Pr 30:21-23
      -- Both make it where the husband does not want to be around her

[Enough about being a good wife; where can we go in Proverbs to learn
about being a good husband...?]

II. THE VIRTUOUS HUSBAND

   A. WHERE'S THE PASSAGE DESCRIBING THE VIRTUOUS MAN...?
      1. A question often raised by women, sometimes suggesting there is
         none
      2. But bear in mind that the Proverbs are primarily addressed to
         the man!
         a. There is half a chapter describing the virtuous woman
         b. There are thirty plus chapters describing the virtuous man!
      -- The entire book, if followed, produces a husband any woman
         would love

   B. THE IDEAL HUSBAND...
      1. Values his wife highly - Pr 18:22; 19:14
         a. He realizes that she is a gift from God
         b. Especially when she proves to be prudent
      2. Gives his wife her due - Pr 31:31
         a. Allows his wife the opportunity to develop her own abilities
         b. Lets her reap the benefits of her own labors
         c. I.e., does not treat her simply as an appendage of himself
      3. Praises his wife profusely - Pr 31:28b-29
         a. Praises her frequently
         b. Does not take her for granted
      4. Trusts his wife implicitly - Pr 31:11
         a. Demonstrates a willingness to trust her
         b. In such areas as her intelligence, her faithfulness, her
            abilities
         c. Is not jealous or suspicious
      5. Content with his wife's love - Pr 5:15-21
         a. Does not look elsewhere
         b. Will save him and his family much harm
      -- A few examples of how Proverbs can help a man be a good spouse

CONCLUSION

1. So much of the joy and meaning of life that God would have us enjoy
   is lost if there is not a good marriage

2. As Solomon wrote in another book of wisdom...

   "Live joyfully with the wife whom you love all the days of your
   vain life which He has given you under the sun, all your days of
   vanity; for that is your portion in life, and in the labor which
   you perform under the sun." - Ec 9:9

The book Of Proverbs can also guide us in developing wholesome families.
Our next study shall consider examples of inspired advice on providing
for a family and raising children...

Executable Outlines, Copyright © Mark A. Copeland, 2011

From Mark Copeland... Wisdom Regarding Marriage (1) (Proverbs)

                         "THE BOOK OF PROVERBS"

                     Wisdom Regarding Marriage (1)

INTRODUCTION

1. The value of Proverbs is that it provides wisdom from God to guide us
   in every realm of life

2. Whether it be family, business, social or spiritual relationships, we
   find inspired advice that enables us to walk in wisdom, "redeeming
   the time, because the days are evil" - cf. Ep 5:15-17

[Let's examine what wisdom the Proverbs has to reveal regarding
marriage, beginning with...]

I. THE SELECTION OF A WIFE

   A. THE IMPORTANCE OF MAKING THE RIGHT CHOICE...
      1. Much happiness in life depends upon make the right choice - Pro 12:4
         a. A good choice greatly enhances the life of the husband
         b. But the wrong choice can destroy a man from the inside out!
      2. It is folly to think that a mistake in this area can be easily
         corrected
         a. Many think divorce can be an easy solution
         b. But God hates divorce and remarriage may not be a viable
            option for the disciple of Christ - cf. Mal 2:16; Mt 19:8-9
         c. Even when it is, if there are children the selection you
            made will always be the mother of your children (for better
            or worse!)
      -- A man needs wisdom from God in choosing whom to marry!

   B. GUIDELINES FOR FINDING A GOOD WIFE...
      1. Seek help from God - Pr 19:14
         a. Success in this venture may depend more upon God than we
            think!
         b. In view of the seriousness of this matter, dare we go about
            it alone?
      2. Do not place priority on good looks alone - Pr 31:30
         a. Beauty is skin-deep, temporary, to which we can easily grow
            accustomed
         b. It is therefore a poor foundation upon which to build a
            life-long relationship
         c. Sadly, most marriages are built on little more than physical
            attraction
      3. Instead, look for these characteristics in a woman:
         a. The fear of the Lord - Pr 31:30
            1) Such a woman possesses the beginning of wisdom - Pr 1:7
            2) Having a wife who is a devout Christian should be the
               primary concern
         b. Discretion - Pr 11:22
            1) This is the ability to do the right thing at the right
               time
            2) Without this, beauty is worthless, and can even be the
               object of ridicule (e.g., dumb blonde jokes)
         c. Wisdom - Pr 14:1
            1) With this virtue in a woman, a good home can be built
            2) Without it, efforts by the husband will be undermined by
               the wife!
      4. Avoid a woman who is contentious (argumentative)!
         a. Picturesque descriptions of such a woman are found in Pro 19:13; 27:15-16
         b. My grandmother (a faithful Christian who as a widow raised
            six children through the Great Depression, and remained a
            widow for over fifty years), pointed out these two verses to
            me when I was a teen-ager:  Pr 21:9,19
      -- It is better to be single and alone, than to be married to the
         wrong person!

[To be married to a godly woman, however, is a wonderful blessing from
the Lord (Pr 18:22). With the aid of Proverbs, we are more likely to
find a good spouse.  The same is true for women in...]

II. THE SELECTION OF A HUSBAND

   A. THERE ARE WAYS TO LEARN ABOUT A MAN...
      1. How does he treat animals?  This reveals a lot about his
         character - Pr 12:10
      2. Does he listen to the advice of others?  That will tell you
         whether he is a fool, or a wise person - Pr 12:15
      3. What type of company does he keep?  You might be destroyed
         along with him - Pr 13:20
      4. Is he quick-tempered?  That reveals whether he is a person of
         understanding - Pr 14:29
      5. How does he make money?  You will suffer the consequences of
         his actions - Pr 15:27
      6. Does he feel like he always has to put in his "two-cents"
         worth?  If so, he lacks knowledge and a calm spirit - Pr 17:
         27-28
      7. Does he have compassion for the poor?  If so, his prayers will
         be answered - Pr 21:13
      -- See how the Proverbs can guide a woman in deciding whom to
         marry?

   B. MEN TO DEFINITELY AVOID...
      1. A womanizer
         a. He will destroy himself and hurt all those involved - Pr 6:
            27-29
         b. If he flaunts God's will before he is married, what
            assurance is there he will not flaunt God's will after he is
            married?
      2. A quick-tempered man
         a. You will become like him and destroy yourself as well - Pro 22:24-25
         b. Men are usually on their best behavior before marriage,
            think of what an angry man will be like after marriage!
      3. A drinker
         a. Alcohol has destroyed many good men - Pr 23:29-30
         b. Most husbands become verbally and physically abusive after
            drinking
      -- Again, it is better to be single and alone, than to be married
         to the wrong person!

CONCLUSION

1. Among the most important decisions we make in life will be these
   two...
   a. With whom shall I spend my life?
      1) Divorce and remarriage is not an option for the faithful
         Christian - Mt 19:6
      2) With one exception - Mt 19:9
   b. Who shall be the father or mother of my children?
      1) This choice cannot be undone once the children are born
      2) Divorce is a violent action, with long-lasting effects - Mal 2:16

2. Dare we make such decisions without consulting the wisdom found in
   God's Word...?
   a. This certainly does not exhaust all that Proverbs has to say about
      selecting a spouse
   b. But I trust that we see that the Proverbs are extremely practical,
      worthy of careful study

In our next lesson, we shall consider gems of wisdom in regards to being
a good spouse...

Executable Outlines, Copyright © Mark A. Copeland, 2011

From Gary.... The goal

Amazement, sheer amazement; this little girl exudes it!!! And looking at her makes me want to be just like her.  Even after all these years, I still find the world a marvelous place and look forward to each new day with the hope something new will present itself. As long as I can read my Bible and follow Jesus' example, I know things will get better and better!!! The Scripture below is true!!!

1 John 3:2 (ASV)

2 Beloved, now we are children of God, and it is not yet revealed what we will be. But we know that, when he is revealed, we will be like him; for we will see him just as he is.

LORD, help me to be like Jesus; and not just for today, but always!!!!