BE
MINE
February
14th is a day that is close to the "hearts" of many.
Children send Valentine cards to one another, young lovers (?) give
gifts of flowers and candy to their "significant other" and
sometimes, just sometimes, even husbands and wives remember each
other on that day for the love that drew them together and grows from
year to year.
The
origin of this particular day and its accompanying traditions are
seated in Roman beginnings and Greek mythology. It is thought to
have begun as the festival of Lupercalia which was a Roman
celebration of love. This springtime event was characterized by the
exchanging of gifts between men and women. One custom of the day was
the pinning on the sleeve of a young man's shirt, the name of the
young damsel who was to accompany him during the festivities. This
ancient custom resulted in the once-common phrase, "He wears her
heart on his sleeve." Valentine's Day later came to have
"religious" significance within the Roman church during the
third century in honor of certain martyrs, one of which came to be
known as "Saint" (?) Valentine.
The
Roman god of love, Cupid, came to be a symbol of this festival, and
even today is a popular icon of our present-day holiday. According
to Roman mythology, Cupid was the son of Venus, the goddess of love,
who was identified in Greek mythology as Aphrodite, the Greek goddess
of love. Cupid's counterpart in Greek mythology was known as Eros.
These names had significance in their meanings and even came to have
an influence on future cultures, our own being no exception. Cupid,
in its Latin roots, means, "desire, longing, or passion."
Eros, from its Greek origin, is where we get our present-day
word, "erotic." It should be no surprise to us
that its meaning is defined by Webster as, "Having to do with
sexual love. Of, or causing sexual feelings or desires."
Considering
these beginnings of what we now call Valentine's Day, is it any
wonder how our culture has come to have a misguided concept about
what "love" is really all about? It is obvious that the
people of that era had a sensual concept of what we call love. Now,
these many centuries later, we talk about "falling
in love" and "making
love" without consideration for the true meaning of what love
really
is. Our common misunderstanding
of love is inseparably tied to the flesh and is confused with the
emotions.
This
is not to speak against Valentine's Day nor to put an evil slant on
the innocent traditions of exchanging gifts and cards as a reminder
of our affection for others. However, it is a reminder to us of our
limited view of love. There is no denying the connection between
love and emotions, however, many fail to understand that the
"feelings" (or emotions) associated with love, is not love
in itself. Nor is love the associated fleshly desires that draw two
to become one flesh, but rather is either an expression
of that love or merely the fulfillment of a lust of the flesh without
any association with love. In fact, this latter consideration is an
irresponsible act bordering on "animal instinct" which, in
reality, is an act devoid
of love, and is rather one of self-gratification without
consideration for the other person.
Young
people need to learn that what Hollywood depicts as love is actually
lust
gone to seed, resulting in sin
grown to maturity. James said it this way; "But each one is
tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires
and enticed. Then, when desire
has conceived, it gives birth to sin;
and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death." (Jas.
1:14-15) The world, in its warped view of love, has blighted our
generation, robbing it of the joyful meaning of true love. They, in
the words of Paul, "suppress the truth in unrighteousness."
(Rom. 1:18) As in past generations, it can still be said that "God
also gave them up to uncleanness, in the lusts of their hearts, to
dishonor their bodies among themselves" (vs. 24) and "For
this reason God gave them up to vile passions..." (vs. 26) and
"...to a debased mind, to do those things which are not
fitting; being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual
immorality," etc. (vs.. 28, 29) In short, man has perverted
the true meaning of love and distorted the sanctity of marriage from
a sacred bond to a temporary convenience for the sake of fleshly
gratification.
Choosing
a mate has been relegated to a frivolous selection process that
focuses on good looks, sensuality, and fun loving good times, rather
than the sober consideration of a lifetime commitment with one who
will unselfishly look to the good of the other with a view toward
helping each other get to heaven as "...heirs together of the
grace of life." (1 Pet. 3:7) Which one of these two pictures
depicts the true nature of love?
God's
kind of love surpasses all of man's expectations. It is found within
the bond of marriage where husbands are to "...love your wives,
just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her"
(Eph. 5:25) and where wives are to have learned from their older
counterparts to "love their husbands..." (Tit. 2:4). If
the younger do not learn these things through the teaching and
examples of their parents and grandparents, they may likely learn a
perverted view from the rest of the world and subsequently miss out
on the joys that God placed there for us.
Young
people desperately need to learn that true love waits. Unlike the
deceptive persuasions used by those with raging hormones and
unrestrained will power, "If you love me" is not the
question to be heeded to give in to the lusts of the flesh, but
rather, "If you love God" becomes the real question whose
answer forthrightly declares "Not now!" Remember,
"Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled, but
fornicators and adulterers God will judge." (Heb. 13:4) "Love
suffers long (it
waits patiently,
gvw)...does not behave rudely (indecently
or shamefully,
gvw), does not seek its own (not
self gratifying).
(1 Cor. 13:4, 5) One who claims to love you will never ask you to do
that which is wrong in the sight of God. And young men, remember,
"Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears
the Lord, she shall be praised." (Prov. 31:30) The question is,
"Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above
rubies." (vs. 10) The rewards of patience in searching for the
right one is the realization of love's precious treasure.
Before
saying, "be mine," - think!
-
Gary V. Womack - Feb. 15, 2004